By Appointment

Consciously recognizing the end of a passing year and welcoming a new one is a ritual that I put into practice somewhere along the way. For me it is a sacred act of wakefulness, of contemplation, of growth. In my own style, I bid farewell to another year in relationship to this temple incarnate. I wake up on this morning of a brand new year, and I give tremendous thanks.

With daily inspiration from The Guru Chant, I say thank you. Thank you to my creator, in the human form of my dear parents, my grandparents, and my ancestors beyond, and to the cosmic mother and father that cradles me with unconditional love.

To all that sustains me, I am with recitations of humble ‘thank you’s, and ‘yes please’s. My beloved husband, and children, my family of blood, and of spirit, thank you. I am bountiful with the gifts of community, of being able to move my body freely, of the desert love around me and the teachings of wisdom and of kindness that bestow me with the strength and grace I need to live as fully and authentically as possible with what I have been given in this karmic cycle. Thank you to the Earth beneath my feet, and the Earth that is my body temple of bones and tissues. Thank you to the water that flows through me, and sustains us all. I say Jai Ma to the fires that burn within, and to the fire of our sacred sun that shines upon us all. Hallelujah for the air that pranifies us, and connects us all through breath. Thank you to the elements of sound, of thought, of consciousness.

I learned the Guru chant in the beginning of my personal journey on a yogic path. I learned that by invoking the energy of the Guru, we can help to free ourselves from the grip of delusion (that comes in so many forms), and to guide us in overcoming the many obstacles that present themselves on our unique path. With this knowledge I am with gratitude for all of the cycle of destruction that has danced on and in my life in this past year. I have been through lettings go that have been tough to take. I have said good-bye to a marriage where I was existing with behaviors and patterns that were outdated, and have had the courage to go through the fire that has led to the rebirth of a partnership with that same bright being that is developing from the depths of 2 hearts and souls making daily commitments to meet one another with respect and appreciation for who the other IS. There have been the small deaths of my sense of self, and larger ones of spirit, and even the loss of a dear friend. In this cycle that moves in full circle I have also said goodbye to my own perceived nest of comfort on so many levels, so that I can continue to spread my wings and soar.
With each passing year, I have the opportunity to become more familiar with myself and see my flavors of joy and of struggle, of strength and of vulnerability. I am with gracious heart to see more deeply into the ways I lived out my old patterns and recently recognized which were serving me and which were getting in the way of my wholeness. I embrace my shadow more fully with the closing of another year. With great process and experience I can welcome the part of me that is competitive, the part that can be so needy, the part that is sometimes the narcissist, the part that likes to always assume she is to blame when a situation goes awry, and the amazingly strong part who is a woman that shines brightly. With this acceptance there is no longer bound energy in trying to be someone I am not, nor in projecting these parts of myself onto others.

This past year was one of amazing transformation that I bow humbly towards. For those of us on an awakened path, we learn that the transformative process is exactly that; a continuous series of changes taking place in a definite manner-though not always in a clear- manner. I just happen to use my birthday as a barometer of the journey of change.

With deep praises and humility, I offer thanks for this life I am flowing with. I shout out respectfully for and to the lessons that I have been offered. And with another year in this precious lifetime, I commit to living with authenticity, so that I may live fully as I am.



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